Monday, February 21, 2011

becoming complete

Wouldn't it be wonderful if my journey towards "becoming Miranda" didn't involve any hardships or trials? What if I only experienced good, happy things in this life?

Part of me would LOVE that... the part that pretends to be content with no personal growth. The part that looks at the fork in the road and decides to follow the well-worn, easy road, even if it's not what God would want.  You know, the sinful part of me.

Then there is this other part of me... The part that wants nothing more than to be close to God.  The part that doesn't care that this means taking the road that is narrow, bumpy, and rarely used.  The patient part of me that rejoices in my growth, despite the bumps in the road... and the part that God rejoices in.  The part of me that most reflects the woman God wants me to be.

Sometimes I'm more one part than the other... and usually there is a conflict between the two.  I guess that makes sense this side of heaven.  Thank goodness for the help, love, and grace of God that guides and nourishes, nurturing me when I am scared to take the more narrow path or when I am fearful in trials.  

I recently heard someone mention the following passage in a sermon, and there is one part in particular that convicted and comforted my aching (yet growing) heart.

"2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything... 12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him."  
~James 1:2-4, 12 (NIV)~

Wow... Finishing and persevering through a trial makes me complete?  Isn't it interesting that we tend to search for "completeness" in the good things and the "if only's?"

If only I had a boyfriend.... or a husband...

If only I had a child...

If only he hadn't treated me this way, or she hadn't done this...

If only I had a bigger house or a better job...

Then I would be complete.

Maybe being complete is about growing closer to God.  Maybe, just maybe, completeness is about being torn down and weathered so that God can rebuild your heart.  Maybe....  

I don't think I will ever be completely complete this side of heaven (is it even possible?), but going through the trials and standing strong in my faith, keeping the joy and love of God in my sight, and allowing Him to hold and heal my heart... That will take me one step closer to becoming the person I am meant to be.  And I am finding "pure joy, my brothers and sisters" in that hope.  

 "17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows."
 ~James 1:17 (NIV)~ 


Meadows said...
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Meadows said...

Well said! Without "test"-ing there is no "test"-imony! Love you!